Well, let's get down to it.
On the 11th, we (Jo, Tash and I) started learning Mandarin at the centre in Desa Sri Hartamas. The teacher's name was Suzy, or Suzie, and in her first class, she made a really weird Mandarin joke. Like we could understand it... So awkward. Gym class was at night, like usual.
The next day, was a boring day, where nothing interesting happened. Oh wait. I wrapped Dan's present awesomely. It was a seal plushy, a matching mug and a pillow. She did ask for something useful... So... Hehe. The pillow was one of those cute mini pillows with a skunk on it. The label said "stinky solutions for stinky friendships". Obviously I HAD to give that to her. Then I found out both Naveen and Kimmy were gonna make it. Naveen was supposed to be in Jamaica by now... Mom made me apply to Newcastle Johor. Yuck.
On Friday, the 13th (IKR!), I had Mandarin and gym class. I decided to wrap Kimmy a simple present, given the short amount of time I was provided with to procure a present. So I gave her a mug, with two little plushies (the ones you attach to your phone), a bear and a tofu/Korean turtle. IT LOOKED LIKE A FREAKIN TURTLE TO ME, but Tash kept saying it was a tofu. WHATEVERRR...
YAY, it was Saturday. I'd packed my bags the night before, and was woken up early to go to the BBW sale. I ended up getting two books, Homeward Bounders and Living With A Willy (hahahaha). I also got some stationery. I was one of Dan's earliest guests, so I started helping to paint the (weird and fragile) polystyrene Santa's Grotto, made by Dan. It looked really weird with just black horizontal lines, so I suggested putting in some vertical lines which would make it look like planks. While we were painting, Naveen and Kimmy arrived (Naveen drove the noob - noob driving noob is a bad idea) and ended up knocking the barrier. The barrier rises and falls for every car, but Naveen, being a noob, decided to drive through after another car. Anyway, I, being a busybody, and proficient Malaysian speaker, decided to liason the talk. Basically, Nav's car got scratched, and the barrier got scratched, no permanent damage was caused. We helped out with the fishing booth after all that nonsense, and it was... An interesting experience. Kids gambling money for fish. Basically you give a kid a paper net to use to catch fish, and if it tears, too bad. Some kid managed to get a lot of fish, but I have no idea what he did with it. We ate some lousy burgers (made by Marcel, Dan's eldest bro), and were given coupons by A. Wendy, and Dan spent the most (DUHHH...), with an approx total of RM200 between us (all I got was a burger, and some water). Dan and Kimmy got some Henna done. Dan got donuts for Tash, but left them at the Eaton fridge. After that we (surprisingly) didn't have to help with the cleanup, so we went to Dan's place. I showered in her (dirty and weird) bathroom (with a lousy shower). Sorry Dan. I don't lie about anything. It's not like I have a gazillion readers or anything so don't worry if you read this, and there's weirder stuff to come anyway. After that I was asked to help the noobs walk the dog (Scruffy). It ended up raining in the middle, so Naveen, who was holding the leash, had to shelter like a hobo in some random house. The rest of us used the car to look for him (he was ahead of us). Anyway, we found him, obviously, and Scruffy, although not THAT wet, still stank. That is one unpleasant smell that I do not wish to experience ever again. Wet dog. Urgh. Then, we went to hangout upstairs, Kimmy went to shower, while Dan and Nav went back to Eaton to help out. Kimmy was so slow, that I nearly fell asleep waiting. I should've gone with the other noobs. Then Dan showered, and wth, she took nearly as long (Kimmy claimed Dan's shower wasn't long so I have no idea why the heck they took so freakin long - I WAS SO BORED). Then we looked at Dan's baby photos (unchronologically categorised - basically a mess). Dan. Was. Chubby. Really. Chubby. As a kid. Shows what vanity does to people. Anyway, we were going to bake after, but Dan, being a noob, left the details of the instructions in her mom's car, which was elsewhere. So... I made a milo mug brownie, since she lacked cocoa powder. It tasted like chocolate cornflakes. So tasteless. What a bad idea. Then Dan had the genius idea to help out with the lopsided upper part of the tree, and brought a ladder out. Which she didn't know how to use. Neither did the rest. Only me. NOOBS. NOOBS EVERYWHERE. So I set the ladder up, and Nav and Dan climbed it to adjust stuff, and succeeded in breaking a plastic bauble. Sigh. WHY IS EVERYONE SO... NOOB. Dan decided to vacuum while sitting on the sofa - you're probably never gonna clean properly. Ever. (We were meant to clear her cupboard today, from all its junk, but Kimmy and Nav's unprecedented attendance prevented that). Kimmy vacuumed the stuff more efficiently, like the housewife she wants to be. Well, that's one of her dreams so far... After that, A. Wendy arrived, and Dan... lied. (I can bet her mom saw through it instantly - "mom, we decided to help with the tree and vacuum the place"). We decided to hang out downstairs (I think - the details escape me). One of her bro's buddies arrived, and it became a bit more awkward. I went to change into party garb, yeah I'm so fab I brought two changes of clothes. He went away after a while and we made some weird videos about us and Nav leaving to Jamaica. Then we went to get ready (I wasn't allowed to help pick the dress - WHICH SUCKED. KIMMY YOU TOOK MY PLACE OF DRESS CHOOSER). Urgh so gay I like dressing a freaking people why do I even urgh I'm so weird, like a freaking self-proclaimed fashion dresser. So when Dan was done (how the heck do people take ages at changing...), Nav and I entered. Nav's pervy eyes noticed something was off and decided to mention it aloud (Dan's bra was left out hahahahahahahaha her reaction - "ARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH GET OUT GET OUT"). So she hid it (IN THE EXACT SAME LOCATION, just under some stuff), and some of the guests were already here. We kept trying to convince Kimmy to wear a dress. What a waste. Anyway, Lizzie (a little girl, friend of Dan's). She's a real actress, that one, freaking out around Naveen. Nav decided to mess with her and carry her (she was sitting on top of Dan's bra) and brought up the bra with Lizzie. Gawd, that was hilarious. A secondary immune response, and she decided to sit on her own bra. -_- So anyway, we got ready, Dan and Kimmy putting on noob make-up, Kimmy's was lopsided, Dan's was a bit smudged, but whatever, they were finally ready. So, I took my first selfie (Dan calls it a wefie for a group) with the noobs in Dan's bathroom. We went down, and ate stuff, Dan decided to fast a bit, being one of the hostesses. As I predicted, and told her, once her friends arrived, which they did, we'd slowly... Be abandoned. Which we were. So Kimmy left with Nav at around 8.30, and me, being infected by their noobness, forgot to give Kimmy her present from Tash, and the one from me. WHY. I realised I was alone so a sat down to watch TV. Adventure Time aka LSD for Kids. And Tom & Jerry. Anyway, Aira, on of Dan's people tried to make it less awkward by asking stuff about me, but seriously, only parents ask those... Dan saved me for a while, then left. Then somehow Scruffy was set free, and my haven was infected with dog. So I had to leave the TV area, and go to Dan's place, which was okay for a while, then that was infected too. Dan's friends are inconsiderate jerks. Sorry Dan. So I had to migrate too, my homebase being infected. The TV area was once again empty so I sat. Dan came to hang with me, thank gawd, but she was busy and couldn't stay much. And plus, she was paranoid about her dad "finding us alone together". Like, srsly? I can't even chill with my own bud at her party whattt... Oh well. It was soon time to go, goodbye, unprecedented awkwardness (I was meant to be one of Dan's two guests - which would have been a good awkward, but well, people decided to say yes a couple of days before). And so, pa and mom finally met Mr and Mrs Teo. Dan, you pinkie swore to deliver Kimmy's present so, let this be a reminder to you. XP I couldn't even give a goodbye hug like wth. Friendship in Asia is so... Unfree. But well, I enjoyed myself most of the day, so that's great. The end. A tiring, interesting day, where I learned some things about Dan's friends, like, who can be trusted, and who can't. Alice, one of the [assistants?] at Eaton, and Crystal, her friend from primary. I think. I pride in being a good judge of character, and I'm pretty sure I'm right. Aira has issues - to do with companionship, Ray, I have no idea, he has secrets, Dimitri, is a two-faced person who can't express authentic dislike, but instead expresses a fake aura. This is a personal judgement I made based on a cold reading.
So. See you soon people. And I'm sorry I included a lot of details, but going to Dan's place has been the most exciting thing in a while.
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